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A women's Crown

I am sure that there is a princess in every woman. That girl who always wants to let her inner sparkle shine but at times gets so distracted by the cares of the world that the sparkle fades. Her life is best described and illustrated by a graph. She has her highest moments when everything is going for her, from school to work to home. All her friends love her, her man adores her, her parents praise her and all her younger sisters/cousins have her as their role model.

Due to all the expectations, she gets lost in taking care of everyone, ensuring that they are all okay, so she puts her needs last. The number of responsibilities that are placed on her overwhelms her and she can not seem to catch a break. If she has a home, she always ensures that her husband and children are always happy and always have the best of everything because the words, "He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord" keep running in her mind and so every day she is found trying to be that good thing.

If she is single as years go by, she starts worrying about when she will get married, because society has made it clear that she is now ripe for marriage. She starts seeing all the guys who come into her life as prospects, and when she tries to position herself to be found, things do not work out, and so she forgets the promise-"Not one of these creatures will be missing, and not one will be without its mate."
Then comes the day when things just fall apart and not working out. You see, her environment may remain the same where things are constant and everyone is smiling at and with her and chances are she will smile back too, but inside her, everything is crumbling down.

I read a book a while back and out of all the pages in that book, one paragraph struck a chord in me. According to the author, when God created the woman, He gave her a strong but flexible backbone, one that would bend as a result of the pressures in her life but be strong enough to handle them without breaking. He gave her tears, and now and then when things get crazy, she will just let them flow to release all the emotions in her heart.

Being a leading lady does not mean that you have it all together. At times, you can laugh all day, then go back home, lock yourself up in your room and cry your eyes out. No, you are not bi-polar. As a girl I know, I yell at my hair brush when my hair gets all tangled up. I can talk about three different things at the same time and get offended when you do not catch up. I may go out with my boyfriend for lunch and see a lady looking really good. I may remember it when we are going back home and ask him if he saw her shoes, and if he mentions her earrings, I might ask him why he was checking her out.

Being a leading lady means that you love yourself just the way you are, regardless of complexion, size, height, race, you name it, and not in a conceited way, but through the revelation that God says you are precious to Him and that He loves you and will give you honor, plus He also says that you are fearfully and wonderfully made, and so with the same measure you love others. It also means that just as you can say no to things that do not go well with your convictions, you can take no as well. Rejection may sting, but you get over it and move on. You may have all these crazy responsibilities, but you know that Jesus said, "Give me your burden which is heavy, and I will give you mine which is light." So you do not kill yourself trying to carry it alone; you give it to Him.

You also understand that marriage, a well-paying job, and children can not complete you. Only Jesus can feel that gap in your heart. When you get into a relationship or marriage with that emptiness in your heart, you will expect your boyfriend/husband to fill it, and since he can not do that, you will resent him. Yet he is supposed to be your husband, not your saviour. You also get it that being saved does not mean you stop living. You still have to look good all the time, only that now your motivation and intentions for looking good are in check (no more trying to trip the brothers any more). You continue to strive to be the best in your field, but your priorities have shifted (seek first the kingdom of God and all the things that shall be added unto you).You no longer date to appease your boredom, but you do it with a purpose (the end goal being marriage). You stop doing things to please people, but you do them to please Christ.

Being a leading lady is a process that involves a lot of molding and remolding, building up and pulling down, bringing together and pulling a part, and that is why, at times, you will feel like a construction site, but what I know is that, in the end, you will be glad you went through it because, just like Job said, "He knows the way that I take and when He has tried me, I shall conquer and overcome. 

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